Creative And Surprising Things To Do When You Feel Lonely
1. Just Show Up
Familiarity breeds
attraction. A study published at the Journal of Personality and Social
Psychology found that same-sex strangers felt increasing affinity towards each
other, after each conversation they had. The same goes for online chat
conversations. Don’t be hesitant to talk to people, even if you feel
awkward or don’t like them at first. If you’re genuinely interested or curious
about others, they’re more likely to reciprocate those feelings.
2. Go On A Solo Date
You know the
problem with group and couples dates? The annoying “So what do we do?” and
“Where do we eat?” questions. When you go on a date with yourself, you’re sure
to go somewhere you actually like and you don’t have to wait around for others
to decide.
3. Know The Difference Between Loneliness and Isolation
Loneliness is an emotion, mostly triggered by a sad
memory. Unfortunately the brain loves to overanalyze things, so even momentary
loneliness can escalate to longer spells because of thoughts like “Why do I
feel so alone?” and “Am I a loser no one loves?” When this happens, just
acknowledge the feeling and don’t overreact.
4. Attend Meetups
Go to meetup.com and find a group in your city. There are
tons of meetup groups catering to every interest, job, city and hobby, so it’s
impossible not to find a group to your liking. People who join meetup.com are
eager to meet new people, and are incredibly friendly so it’s a nice way to
make new friends.
5. Watch A Movie
Watch a movie
alone or call some friends to go with you—it doesn’t matter. What’s important
is you immerse yourself in an interesting story that’ll erase your gloomy
thoughts. Watch a chick-flick, or a super hero movie—anything but a tear
jerker, really —and grab lots of candy and popcorn.
6. Adopt A Cute Pet
A furry cat or dog will cheer you up. The playfulness of
pets, plus the troubles (and fun) you’ll experience while training them will
make you forget about your troubles. Even a goldfish or pretty parrot can do
wonders for your mood.
7. Identify The Cause Of Your Loneliness
“What to do when you feel lonely?”
I can’t imagine
how many people have Googled that phrase when they felt the pangs of
loneliness. Unfortunately, it’s not the best question to ask. Would you ask a
doctor for a prescription before they check your symptoms?
Instead of trying
things randomly, hoping one solution will do the trick—losing hope and feeling
worse when it doesn’t—it’s better to identify the cause of your loneliness
first. If you were previously happy in your own company, what could’ve caused
you to feel lonely this time?
Do your friends
make you feel lonely? Is it your work or surroundings, perhaps? The cause of
your loneliness will clue you in on the appropriate solution.
8. Read Fiction
Please don’t pick a Dummies book on how to stop feeling
lonely. Reading self-help when you’re feeling miserable will make just
you feel worse. Read a good novel instead. Losing yourself in a good story or
identifying with a powerful character will boost your confidence and fill you
with a sense of adventure.
9. Take A Bath
Where do good ideas come from? In the shower, right?
Taking a nice, long, and relaxing bath is a great way to be bask in your alone
time, instead of drowning in self-pity. Ladies, prepare a glass of red,
chocolates and magazines. Gents, take a bubble bath ala Chandler by taking a
manly boat with you!
10. Take A Random Bus, Train or Flight Off to Anywhere
Taking public transportation to a random location forces
you to do two things—be in the company of strangers, and change your
environment. Doing this will ward off loneliness and cure your wanderlust as
well.
11. Dance
Sometimes, we feel lonely because we’re actually alone.
So take this chance to do the things you can only do when
you’re alone, like dancing naked or jumping on the bed with your shoes on.
Doing crazy stuff alone will give you a good laugh.
12. Go For A Quick Run
Running is scientifically proven to make you happier.
Even 30 minutes of walking can instantly lift your mood, according to a 2006
study published at Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise.
13. Watch Friends
Okay, it’s now
obvious that I love this show! I’ve watched it 5x now and it still makes me
laugh. Watch “The One with the Unagi” and “The One With the Embryos” if you’re
feeling lonely and need a good laugh.
14. Get Coffee
Go to a coffee shop far from your apartment or office.
Then order coffee and sit on the bar, or that big table on the center where you
can talk to people. Compliment someone on their tie, shoes or bag. Start a
conversation. Don’t worry if you’re bad at small talk, because chances are you
won’t see that person again.
15. Look Through Old photos
Prepare some snacks or some tea and canapés ala afternoon
high-tea, if you’re feeling fancy. Reminisce the good old days with a friend,
your mom or sis. Remembering your crazy antics, and most embarrassing moments
caught on camera will fill you with nostalgic memories and drive away
loneliness.
16. Get A Camera
Get a camera, then go out and start taking beautiful
pictures of things around you. A sunset, a barking dog, or a laughing
baby—filling your life with beautiful things can take your mind off of
loneliness.
17. Attend Classes For A Fun New Exercise Like
Air Yoga, Pole Dancing, Or Trampoline Jumping
The exact exercise doesn’t matter. The point is to get
yourself moving, while trying something new in the supportive environment of a
group class.
18. Start A 5-Minute Gratitude Journal
It’s hard to feel down when you know that you have a lot
to be thankful for. When you don’t know what to be thankful for, just
write what you feel. Sometimes, it can help you identify why you feel lonely in
the first place.
19. Watch Inspiring Ted Talks
Ted Talks are inspiring and informative. I don’t know
why, but watching a few Ted Talks really help when I feel lonely and helpless.
Some of my favorites are: “Connected, but alone?” by Sherry
Turkle, and “Success, failure and the drive to keep creating” by
Elizabeth Glibert.
20. Plan A holiday
Nothing beats loneliness and overwhelm like planning a great holiday vacation. Looking up flights, hotel deals and stuff to do on a random faraway location will boost your spirits and steer your mind off your negative thoughts. You don’t really need to book a trip, sometimes the act of planning for one is enough.
21. Create Something New
Wondering how to not feel lonely, when you actually
prefer to be alone? Getting bored is a prerequisite of feeling lonely. And
what’s one of the main causes of getting bored? Having nothing to do. So keep
yourself occupied! Try a new recipe. Create a scrapbook. Finish that DIY
project you’ve been postponing for so long.
22. Do Something Craaazy
Dress up like a tourist, and do all the cheesy touristy things in your city. Eat the local delicacy, tour the crowded tourist spots and explore new locations you’ve never heard of.
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